My wife, Becky, and I recently returned from a fantabulous 3-week vacation in Scotland. This was one of our bucket list trips\u2026 and yes, there are plenty more to come.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But two months prior to this trip, we began an unexpected and unwanted<\/em> journey.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I know many have been through this type of ordeal and I want to stress that not all outcomes were like ours. I\u2019ve always known that there are no guarantees in life, but this journey hit a little too close to home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Timeline<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n
November 2022 \u2013 we began planning our trip to Scotland.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
March 21 \u2013 we celebrated our 42nd wedding anniversary.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
March 22 \u2013 we celebrate (again) with long-time friends whose anniversary is on March 22.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
March 23 \u2013 we take a trip to the ER: Becky has pain in the lower right abdomen. Thinking appendicitis or gallstones. However, the doctors report: \u201cI\u2019ve got some bad news: you have a 3-inch mass located in the area of your cecum\u201d (where the small intestines meet the large intestines). This was one of those \u201cOh shit!\u201d moments.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
March 28 \u2013 meeting with the oncologist surgeon. Surgery scheduled for April 20. Plan to cut it out and resect the colon. Unsure if it\u2019s colon cancer at this time. Becky\u2019s dad was a surgeon in Miami. His philosophy was, \u201cwhen in doubt, cut it out.\u201d We ask the surgeon, \u201cShould we postpone our trip to Scotland, beginning June 1?\u201d Dr: \u201cAbsolutely not. I see no reason why you cannot go. You\u2019ll have 6 weeks to recover after surgery.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
April 20 \u2013 major 2\u00bd-hour surgery (robot-assisted) to remove 4 inches of colon, including the mass, lymph nodes, etc.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
April 21 \u2013 Becky walks out of the hospital with minimal pain. Let me repeat that. A little more than 24 hours after major surgery, my wife WALKS out of the hospital<\/strong>, and we come home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
May 2 \u2013 Surgeon reports: \u201cAppendix cancer, but very rare. All lymph nodes are clear. Referral to oncologist for next steps.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
May 22 \u2013 Oncologist: \u201cI do not <\/strong>recommend any further treatments at this time. With this type of Stage 1 cancer, the treatments would not do anything for you. We\u2019ll monitor you over the next few years.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let me pause here and tell you what a load had been lifted from our shoulders.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
June 1 \u2013 Leave for a 3-week vacation in Scotland.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That 2-month Blur<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n
I won\u2019t go into details here, but I wanted to mention that the time from the initial report (\u201cyou have a mass\u201d) through the surgery and after the oncologist report (\u201cno chemo needed\u201d), those two months were, and still remain, a blur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There were times when I went down a dark path, not knowing what the future would hold. There were times when I went through those mental checklists that no one should have to think about. And then, there were those times (many of them) where family and friends called, emailed, phoned, texted, that we were both lifted up by their spirits and their prayers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m a pretty religious guy\u2026 more than just going to church on Sunday. There are times when someone asks for prayers, and I spend a little quiet time praying. There are times when I\u2019m thankful for all the blessings we have.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But I\u2019ll be honest with you\u2026 being on the receiving end of those prayers and support was one thing that helped me get through those dark times. Thank the good Lord there weren\u2019t many of them, but they\u2019re there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Scotland<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Besides being a wonderful country to visit (with great Scotch, by the way), our small group 12-day tour (total of 4, plus the driver\/guide) put about 1,400 miles on the van. Highlands, Isle of Sky, Outer Hebrides, Orkneys, and more mainland Scotland\u2026 all varying in culture, landscape, and terrain. Becky & I also tacked a few days before and after the tour to spend in Edinburgh & Glasgow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As I mentioned before, it was fantabulous. One thing we did the first few days\u2026 we bought a post card and mailed it to the surgeon. \u201cJust wanted to say, \u2018We made it. Hi from Scotland\u2019 and thank you for everything.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When the tour was winding down, the driver\/guide (Alan) asked us what we liked best about the tour. I think all tour guides ask that question, both for the company (Best Scottish Tours<\/strong>) as well as how they personally did. When it was my turn, I could only think of one thing: \u201cI\u2019m just happy we were able to be here.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A Different View on Life<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n
In the 90s, there was a term used in the business industries to explain how one\u2019s thought process or \u201cmodel\u201d changed. It was called a \u201cParadigm Shift.\u201d It\u2019s not used as often these days\u2014I\u2019m sure there\u2019s a replacement term. But that always stuck with me, because in my time during the Navy, followed by being a city firefighter, followed by my career as a legal technology consultant, I\u2019ve personally experienced many \u201cparadigm shifts.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But this one, this \u201ccancer journey,\u201d as I call it, scared the bejesus out of me. Both my wife and I are not afraid of dying. We\u2019re at that age (68) where we\u2019ve lived a great life and know we\u2019re on the downhill slope. We\u2019ve both witnessed death in our professions, as well as our parents and kin. One of those dark paths I wandered down is \u201cwhat am I going to do without Becky\u2026 without my best friend\u2026 without my lifelong soul mate?\u201d That\u2019s what scared me the most. Fortunately, I don\u2019t have that thought anymore, not today anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, this trip to Scotland was more than just a bucket list trip. It was a chance to renew ourselves after an arduous journey.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I know many people have been on this journey and many have lost loved ones. In fact, while we were in Scotland, I received notice of two friends\/acquaintances who lost their soulmates.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A recent quote from Michael Altshuler<\/strong> that hit home: \u201cThe bad news is that time flies. The good news is that you\u2019re the pilot.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Life is short. As we used to say in the Navy\u2026 \u201cLive the dream, baby. It\u2019s an adventure.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Until we meet again, Andy<\/p>\n\n\n\nBecky & Andy Adkins, Isle of Skye Scotland (June 2023) Photo credit: Alan Gillespie<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
![\"Scotland](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/azadkinsiii.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/Storr_BeckyAndy.jpg?resize=800%2C616&ssl=1\")