Trivia Questions (Answers @ end)
- Who said, “No problem can ever be solved at the level of awareness at which it was created.”?
- In what movie (and who said it) did we hear, “Why don’t you go upstairs and book a conference room and see if you can talk him to death.”?
- In what song (and who sang it) did we hear the following?
Time has come today young hearts can go
Their way can’t put it off another day
I don’t care what others say they say we
Don’t listen anyway time has come today
Listen to the audio of this blog, read by Andy Adkins. Click the “Audio” button below.
Remember when you were a kid… perhaps a scout? You know… those early “learning” years.
Remember going out at night for a “snipe hunt?” You’re given a pillowcase with specific instructions to walk quietly until you get to the “right spot,” then make some odd noises to attract the strange creatures. You’re out there alone, but ready to prove you’ve got what it takes to catch a snipe. The other members in your scout troop would chase the snipe toward you.
But instead, they return to camp, leaving you—the victim—alone in the dark only to discover you’ve been duped and “holding the bag.”
Yeah… you remember that rite of passage, don’t you?
Did you ever work at a gas station as a teenager, freshly minted in high school, and eager to earn a day’s dollar to take your best girl out? The head mechanic asks you to fetch some “blinker fluid” because the customer’s car turn signal doesn’t work properly.
Or… during a car tune up, you’re asked to hold the disconnected spark plug wire over a small bucket to “catch fresh sparks” while the lead mechanic cranks the engine in order to recharge the spark plug… only to get an electrical shock.
Well… maybe not everybody, but yours truly fell for that… once.
And Then… The Navy
I’m sure other military branches have their own “brands of initiation,” but I’ll share a few of the more common Navy “rites of passage.”
It was not unusual to send a new recruit (aka, “boot,” “newbie,” or “FNG”) to various departments on dubious errands. Because the recruit was new to the ship, many old salts took advantage of their naivety and lack of knowledge about such tasks… me included, both as the “FNG” as well as the “salt,” though I’d argue at 20 years old, I wasn’t really an “old salt.”
While I experienced only a few of these while stationed at NAS Agana, Guam (’73-75; Crash & Rescue Division), I experienced plenty while aboard USS Kitty Hawk, CV-63 (’75-77). That was probably because while at sea, there is nowhere to run.
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One prank we’d play on the FNGs was to send them around the ship visiting various Air Department divisions for “unique” items. Since I was in V-1 Division and worked on the flight deck, we all knew how to “break in” a new airman. Of course, these practical jokes weren’t limited to the Air Department; other departments on the ship had their own tasks, specific to their working environment.
For example, we’d tell an FNG to fetch a left-handed screwdriver or a metric crescent wrench from the V-2 Division. Sometimes he’d shake his head, like he wasn’t really sure, but the “sternness” in our request made it clear it was a real and immediate request.
He’d head over to V-2 Division and the airman he asked knew exactly what was going on and told him, “We don’t have one in the tool box right now, but I’m pretty sure V-3 does. Check with V-3 and ask for Don; he’ll know.” Of course, Don also knew exactly what to do.
It took two or three trips before the new guy figured out we were pulling his leg.
Navy “Tasks” for FNGs
Basin Trials – we assigned this task to a new seaman to watch the head (bathroom) sinks and toilets for any leaks as the ship switched systems (from land-based to sea-based) before getting underway. Of course, there would be no leaks, but no one told him that. And… oftentimes, he’d be there for hours until someone informed him his “watch” was over.
BT punch – even though I worked on the flight deck, there were 5,500 sailors aboard Kitty Hawk. Down below decks was a whole ‘nother group of dedicated men (and now women) who kept the ship running smoothly. They might ask a seaman recruit to go to the boiler room for BT punch. A BT is a Boiler Technician rate and usually, the BT was perfectly happy to oblige by giving the new seaman a fist “punch.”
Bucket of prop wash – after a day or two at sea (or if the squadron flew their aircraft aboard), a new airman is told to fetch a bucket of prop wash to wash the planes. Sooner or later, s/he either “gets it” or someone would inform the sailor. Prop wash is actually the wind that comes off an aircraft’s propellers or jet engine.
Darken the Chief’s Mess – someone may suggest a new seaman head over to the CPO (Chief Petty Officer) mess to turn off the lights when the OOD (Officer of the Deck) pipes “darken ship” over the 1MC (ship’s main intercom). “Darken ship” only applies to lights that can be seen outside the ship. Note that Chiefs do not take kindly to someone turning off their lights and may try to find out who sent the FNG on this particular fool’s errand.
Fetch a Gig Line – we often asked a new boot to fetch three feet of “gig line.” “Line” is another term for rope in the Navy. The seaman ventures around the ship asking various departments where to find the gig line. After several attempts, either the sailor figures out it’s a joke, or a kind salt explains that the “gig line” is the imaginary line of a button-down shirt, belt buckle, and pants zipper, down a person’s front.
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Get your ID10T form signed – everyone knows what an “eye-dee-ten-tee” is, right? Imagine having to fill out an ID10T form? I kid you not.
Green Lamp Oil for Starboard Running Light / Red Lamp Oil for Port Running Light – having spent a lot of time on the water (Kingsley Lake, Florida) at night as well as flying a private plane, the green light is on the starboard (right) side; the red light is on the port (left) side. The Navy hasn’t used oil for running lamps for eons. This is another run-around, but one that may take a while for the recruit to figure out.
Low visibility detail – ships at sea may sometimes cruise into areas of low visibility. A lookout may be posted to the forecastle during foggy conditions in busy sea lanes. The Boatswain’s Mate requested the new seaman assigned to “low visibility detail” to signal the bridge reporting whether the ship’s whistle works properly. FYI – a deaf person could hear the ship’s whistle, it is so loud.
Credit: Al Nolf, SCPO (’68-89)
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Set the mail buoy watch – this is probably one of the more common gags. The important thing is here the “build up.” Since the ship’s crew expects mail (letters from home, care packages, etc.), a plane would fly overhead, following the same course as the ship, and drop the mail buoy. It had to be retrieved, otherwise the ship would have to turn around and make another pass. We’d dress the FNG seaman assigned to the “mail buoy watch” in hardhat, foul weather gear, sound-powered headphones, lifejacket, lifeline, and a gaff to catch the mail bag on the buoy. He’d be posted on the forecastle and instructed to keep his eyes peeled for the buoy. After 20-30 minutes, the Boatswain’s Mate would cuss him out for missing it.
Shore line stretcher – I know several FNGs who fell for this one. We’d tell the new recruit to find a “shore line stretcher,” who usually spent a lot of time looking for one. The “shore line” is actually where the ocean meets land. But if you said it with the right amount of confidence, the FNG believed it.
Striped paint – painted lines exist all over the flight deck, including the foul line. Someone (not me) once asked a new airman to fetch a can of “striped paint” so we could repaint the dingy, faded foul line (alternating red and white). To add to the insult, we asked him to make sure he got the red and white stripe paint, as opposed to the purple and white stripe paint used by the grapes (V-4 Division, ABFs).
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Tuning pipe for foghorn – a foghorn is a very loud sounding device typically used to warn other Navy ships of navigational hazards or other ships, usually during foggy conditions (that’s why it’s called a “fog” horn). Sometimes an older, more “experienced” BM (Boatswain’s Mate) would instruct a new BM to fetch a tuning pipe to make sure the foghorn is in tip-top operating condition.
I’m sure there are plenty more harmless pranks others either partook in or fell for. If I missed your favorites, feel free to add in the comments.
Stay safe, my friends.
Until we meet again,
Andy
Answers:
- Albert Einstein.
- The Bourne Identity (2002); Conklin (Chris Cooper).
- The Time Has Come Today (1967); The Chambers Brothers; written by Joseph Lamar Chambers, Willie Mack Chambers. [Blogger note: I didn’t know this one either; I had to look it up.]
Andy Adkins is a US Navy veteran (’73-77) and the author of several books. His newest novel, NEVER FORGET, is the story of A Vietnam Veteran’s Journey for Redemption & Forgiveness. NEVER FORGET is FREE (eBook, PDF) for all veterans. Download your FREE copy HERE.
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