Navy Friday Funny – The Principal and the First Grade Teacher

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Each military branch of the United States has its own cultures, language, and traditions. In the Navy, the Chief Petty Officer serves a dual role as both a technical expert and as a leader; emphasis being more on leadership. There is always a sense of humor that comes from this culture. For the Navy, I find the more ingenious humor typically involves a CPO.

Enjoy this Navy Friday Funny.


A first grade teacher was having a little trouble with one of her students.

One day she asked Tommy what his problem was and he confidently replied with a smirk, “I’m too smart for the first grade. My sister is in the third grade, and I’m smarter than her, too!”

The teacher marched him up to the school office and explained the situation. The principal had previously spent 25 years in the Navy, most of which was as a Chief Petty Officer.

He knew just how to deal with smart-alecky kids, much like the young sailors under his watch. He told her that he would give Tommy a test, and if he failed to answer even one question, he would have to return to the first grade and be quiet.

The teacher looked over at Tommy and both nodded in agreement.

Principal: “What is 3 times 3?”

Tommy quickly answered: “9.”

Principal: “6 times 6?”

Tommy answered, again with no hesitation: “36.”

And so it went on like this—the principal asked him every question a third grader should know. Finally, after about an hour, he confided in the teacher, “I see no reason Tommy can’t go to the third grade. He answered all my questions correctly.”

The teacher wasn’t satisfied; the questions were too easy. She asked if it would be acceptable to ask a few more questions. The principal looked over at Tommy and both nodded in agreement.

Teacher: “What does a cow have 4 of that I only have 2 of?”

The principal wasn’t quite sure what kind of question that was, but he didn’t say anything.

Tommy: “Legs.”

Teacher: “What do you have in your pants that I don’t have?”

The principal gasped out loud, but before he could stop him from answering, Tommy said, “pockets.”

Teacher: “What starts with ‘F’ and ends with ‘K’ and means a lot of excitement?”

Tommy answered, again without hesitation: “Firetruck.”

The principal breathed a big sigh of relief and told the teacher, “Promote Tommy to the fifth grade; I got the last four questions wrong myself.”


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Andy Adkins is a US Navy veteran (’73-77) and the author of several books. His newest novel, NEVER FORGET, is the story of A Vietnam Veteran’s Journey for Redemption & Forgiveness. NEVER FORGET is FREE (eBook, PDF) for all veterans. Download your FREE copy HERE.